Using words like should, must, perfect, never, lazy, positive, and the word purpose can set you up for failure. Why?
Hear how it sounds.
I should be doing this. Who says so? Why put unnecessary pressure on yourself? Do what you can achieve and embrace what you can do.
I must get my homework done. Now, here’s a word that will stop you in your tracks. The minute you think you must, you can place yourself into overwhelm. How about I will try for a few minutes and see if I wish to continue?
I never get things right. Is that true? Try to objectively look at your reality and recognize that you do get things done. Give yourself the credit you deserve.
I am too lazy to get my work done. How about I haven’t started my work…yet. By adding the word yet, you give yourself hope that you will get to your work.
Psychology is now teaching us to think of a positive thought to replace a negative thought. In my opinion, that is a difficult task to place on oneself. Instead, I recommend replacing a negative thought with a beneficial thought. What can you think of that will benefit you at the moment?
Trying to determine one’s purpose might be too lofty a goal. In lieu of a purpose, how about trying to reach a sense of fulfillment? Fill your life with moments of fulfillment and see how you feel.
Language is very important in our self-talk. What we choose to say to ourselves can help improve our self-confidence and self-esteem. Work on choosing words that will help your well-being in the short and long term.
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